Can You “Sustain” the Anger?

The two subject lines pretty much set the tone for all that follows: “Urge your legislators to lead Georgia into a Sustainable Future” blares the Georgia Environmental Action Network, “Coal Ash is Hazardous to Our Health” warns Earthjustice.

I gave these electronic petitions (and four others) to the  Due Diligence Test Panel to evaluate. Board members gave G.E.A.N’s email the worst overall marks, and they gave Earthjustice’s the best. The feedback broadly corroborates the Water Words That Work method:

• G.E.A.N did not follow Step Three: Swap the Shoptalk, packing its email with vague terms like “sustainable” and “rollbacks.”
• Earthjustice did follow Step Four: Insert the Words, filling its email with terms like “health,” “safety,” and “clean.”

Here are some numbers:

Click the image to a larger version

There’s plenty of market research out there which concludes that “sustainable” is eco-shoptalk, not plain English. Some everyday citizens get it, some don’t. Here are a few test panel comments that give you a flavor for how everyday citizens react to this word:

• “Leading Georgia into sustainability in the future. What sort of sustainability remains uncertain, but I’m fairly sure it has something to do with the water and the trees.”
• “What is a sustainable future? Why should we want one?”
• “No rollbacks” and “sustainable future” are terms that might be unfamiliar or difficult for some people.”

That’s probably not quite the reaction that G.E.A.N was hoping for when they wrote this. It’s certainly not the kind of reaction that leads someone to actually sign a petition.

Overall, G.E.A.N’s email is cerebral and abstract — so the sounding board’s reaction to it is faint and tentative. In contrast, Earthjustice’s email reads like the script for a Walker, Texas Ranger episode: ruthless greedy corporate villains, virtuous and innocent victims, incompetent and weak-willed bureaucrats, and a hero — you — who stands up for truth and justice by signing the petition to demand action.

The storyline is so cliched that you can hear the soundtrack in your head! But it connects. Test panel members mostly react to the message with righteous anger:

• “The issue here is an irresponsible government that prefers a dirty profitable business over the lives and health of their citizens. It should be solved as soon as possible…”
• “EPA has a plan to regulate coal ash, a very toxic waste, but lobbyists have been successful to date in blocking the approval and implementation of the plan.”
• “While the issue has not affected me personally or anyone that I know, it affects fellow citizens of this country, and its important to be concerned about others if society is to function responsibly.”

And I bet those are exactly the kind of responses that Earthjustice wanted. That’s the kind of emotional reaction that people have right before they actually sign a petition.

Click the links below for the full scoop:

• Email: Urge Your  Legislators to Lead Georgia into a Sustainable Future, Georgia Enviornmental Action Network
• Due Diligence Test Panel Review of the G.E.A.N email
• Email: Coal Ash is Hazardous to Our Health, Earthjustice
• Due Diligence Test Panel Review of the Earthjustice email

P.S. The true purpose of the Due Diligence Test Panel is to evaluate draft electronic petitions and other materials before you release them into the wild. I had the board evaluate these two already-published emails as part of the shakedown cruise for the new service. Once the service launches for real, I will share your feedback with you in private, and not post it to the blog for the world to see!

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